im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
As shirtless as possible
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
