There is no way he is gay with that hair.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Randomize
