I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
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