Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
