East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
