Non-Jews are for practice
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Drunk is a universal language darling
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