Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Randomize
