yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize
