if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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