He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't just leave with hair like that
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
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