It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
