I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize