there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
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