Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
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