White coat. Heels.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Randomize
