there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Randomize
