Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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