shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
