it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
Randomize
