im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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