You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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