i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Randomize
