we have officially lost it.
my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
