I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
