you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Randomize
