What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Randomize
