I just made out with a guy for $7.
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
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