Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
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