Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I'm way too hungover for life right now
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
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