Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
