Just cropdusted the office
I intend to get homeless drunk
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
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