just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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