in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
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