Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Randomize
