I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
