I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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