He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
