Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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