I should be sponsored by Trojan
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Randomize