Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize