...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
