:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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