I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
