Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize