I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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