If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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