my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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