would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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