We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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