bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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