are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
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