nut hugger
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Randomize